The Adventures of Greg Spence Wolf

Do All Lives Really Matter? 

          
DO  ALL  LIVES  MATTER?        

 
Do all lives matter in this country 
If Black lives don't matter to the police. 
If Derek Chauvin can kill with a knee 
For eight minutes on national TV
And it takes a riot to get him arrested
Why do we even need one protest
When a non-violent person is killed by the police
Do Blck Lives matter in this country ?

 

Do all lives matter in this country 
If black lives don't matter to vigilantes. 
If George Zimmerman can get away with murder 
Do ll lives matter in this country? 
By Greg Spence Wolf 7/2/2020             

 
Elijah McClain Didn't Have a Gun 
Elijah McCalin was choked to death 
In Aurora Colorado by a policeman. 

Breonna Taylor didn't have a record and wasn't wanted by the police, 
Breonna Taylor wasn't a threat 
Breona Taylor wasn't under arrest 

If Breonna Taylor who didn't hurt anyone 
Who didn't have a record 
who didn't carry a gun 

So why Breonna Taylor's apartment targeted. 
Why did they batter down her door in Charlottesville, 
Even though the report said she wasn’t a threat/ 
The neighbors called the cops on the cops because they thought it was an attack, 
by someone other than the cops, 
It was an attack, but it was an attack by the cops 
  Who wanted to arrest a man who wasn't there. 
© Greg Spence Wolf  7/8/202   
  

 
           

+3

 
   

 

Thoughts on abuse 

There are many types of physical and emotional abuse that I have witnessed and or experienced. 

I have experienced them from family members, housemates, coworkers and random strangers.

When I was a teen I used to ride my bicycle through the parking lot of the corner bar. While a bar might be a place for a 13-17 year old kid to avoid. It was usually the safest and most convenient route. I avoided a busy street that way, it led to the convenience store and people smoked inside in those days, so no one was in the parking lot to hit with my bike.

One night this "safer" route was scary. A woman in her twenties was running out of the bar crying as a similar aged man yelled and grabbed her.

He said some thing like, "You can't" run away from me because, "you're my girlfriend."

I decided to keep riding my bike. I was no match for an angry drunk. No one, especially my mother, would have blamed me for riding away and saying nothing.

And I did. But in my head I rationalized doing so not using a healthy fear of being injured by this asshole. But for a moment I actually thought, "I guess that's okay if she's his girlfriend."

Before I could ask my self if that was true, a woman charged out after him yelling, "Oh no you don't. Get your hands off of her."

She was followed by at least two supporters.

This 5 foot 7 teenager didn't wait to see how this fight played out.

But the courage of her response inspired me to see abuse differently. To see all abuse as unacceptable. And to have the courage later in life to challenge some abuse that I felt safe handling.
Threats of physical violence while pursuing someone and screaming at them is obviously abuse to most people. Psychological and emotional abuse are much harder to recognize and based on my own observations, more likely to be tolerated by people who would never tolerate the more aggressive types of abuse.


Mental mistreatment or emotional abuse is deliberately causing mental or emotional pain.

Examples include intimidation, coercion, ridiculing, harassment, treating an adult like a child, isolating an adult from family, friends, or regular activity, use of silence to control behavior, and yelling or swearing which results in mental distress. 
https://www.dshs.wa.gov/altsa/home-and-community-services/types-and-signs-abuse 

Accusing, blaming, and denial  

This behavior comes from an abuser’s insecurities. They want to create a hierarchy in which they’re at the top and you’re at the bottom.  

Here are some examples:

Jealousy. They accuse you of flirting or cheating on them.  


Turning the tables. They say you cause their rage and control issues by being such a pain.  


Gaslighting- Denying something you know is true. An abuser will deny that an argument or even an agreement took place. 

It’s meant to make you question your own memory and sanity.  


Using guilt. They might say something like, “You owe me this. Look at all I’ve done for you,” in an attempt to get their way. 

EX: "You blame a lot on ____'


Goading then blaming. Abusers know just how to upset you. But once the trouble starts, it’s your fault for creating it.


Denying their abuse. When you complain about their attacks, abusers will deny it, seemingly bewildered at the very thought of it.  


Accusing you of abuse. They say you’re the one who has anger and control issues and they’re the helpless victim.  (Example - Someone screams at you five times, but when you yell back to ask them to stop they accuse of screaming at them.)


Trivializing. When you want to talk about your hurt feelings, they accuse you of overreacting and making mountains out of molehills.  

When someone hit me and I brought it up later I was told to man up and take it like a man by two people. The hitter and a buddy.

Here's a song about trivializing written by Jimi Hendrix and performed wonderfully by


Saying you have no sense of humor. Abusers make personal jokes about you. If you object, they’ll tell you to lighten up.  


Blaming you for their problems. Whatever’s wrong in their life is all your fault. You’re not supportive enough, didn’t do enough, or stuck your nose where it didn’t belong.  


Destroying and denying. They might crack your cell phone screen or “lose” your car keys, then deny it. 

Scapegoating - Building up a negative image about another.

"I hope someday they figure out what kind of person such and such or so and so is."

 

     People have used intimidtion on me by calling the police on me when I didn't obey them in my own home.

     People have used intimidation on me by calling a friend to gang up on me during an argument

      A neighborhood gang smashed my bike when I was a teen in Colonie New York. They let me know I wasn't welcome in that neighborhood. I didn't go back.
I believe that teaching kids to hate another coparent is a form of abuse. 

 

 

https://www.healthline.com/health/signs-of-mental-abuse#accusing-blaming-and-denial 

+12

Who Shall We Infect Next, Said the Coronaviruses 

Who shall we infect next said the Coronaviruses,

 
           

We infected your grandma

 
           

Keep her away from Grandpa

 
           

Who shall we infect next said the Coronaviruses,

 
           

We can't go on without a host,

 
           

We went to the rock concert

 
           

We went to the revival

 
           

We depend upon you gathering ... for our survival,

 
           

That's how we go viral.

 
           

we infected the vulnerable,

 
           

And then filled up the hospitals.

 
           

We went to the nursing home

 
           

And then to the veteran's home

 
           

They weren't social distancing so we found many hosts.

 
            New Lyrics Greg Spence Wolf 7/7/2020Based on "Who Shall I Eat Next" by Bergman Broom           
  
 
 

 

Thoughts on Parenting 

When you watch kids they take up your time.

Working and planning and making sure things turn out fine

Because they're depending on you to and what you decide

To come out right.

 

I raise kids for five and a half years,

Held their hands, dried their tears,

Listenned to their hopes and fears.

 

From early in the morning till you tuck them in at night

There's so many details you got to get right

Including getting them to the bus on time.

And waving at them while they drive out of sight.

 

Hoping that they'll eat the food upon their plates

Hoping that you can find food that they don't hate.

 

===================

One of the first days I was watching my stepson, back in fall 2013 I was doing dishes in the kitchen when a friend called to ask for advice. My four year old stepkid was making a blanket, stuffed animal fort over the living room furniture. That was one of his favorite activities.

My friend asked me what the commotion was in the background and I explained that they were playing and having a blast.

She said, "Ah, childcare." To which I replied.

"Parenting"

My stepkid loved making forts out of blankets and pillows. He loved pillow fights. At times it seemed childish, but then again, why shouldn't children be a little childish.

 

I had a good relationship with my stepson. But our wake up routine was challenging.

I remember all the different strategies I used to persuade my son to get out of bed quicker .

One family member told me to drag em out. I decided that I wasn't going to push his feet out of bed as I was told, and instead that I would persuade him to get up. This is easier said than done.
Another family member used to remove his blankets, so I tried that. This often led to a defensive reaction and then to me rationalizing the action. Ultimately, it all seemed too abrupt and I eventually figured out a two new ways to get a stubborn kid up and excited about the day.

After years of realizing I had an oppositional approach as well. I tried using low interest but interesting videos, like folk music. I found that this created a more relaxing mood and less resistance to getting up. When I was able to get myself up independently as a kid I would wake up to the radio. With my stepkid, a music video that isn't a favorite, but is still good, put him in a good mood and bred a more cooperative attitude. 

The other strategy was to offer a reward for getting up on time, usually a snack after school. I raised the bar by a minute each day, so that the child became more self disciplined and was more likely to look at getting up positively. 

At one time, this was working so well that we were twenty minutes early to school. My 2nd grade stepkid asked if they could get a snack before school. I said yes because they did a good job and traffic was light . They got fritos and I got gas and coffee.

There was a three dollar limit on the treat and it had to be free of artificial colors, flavors or preservatives.

+8

I want equality for step parents in divorces. 

Even though I have not been a legally engaged stepdad for almost three years, I still worry about my kids. I still wonder if they are upset about something that happened at school. I still wonder if they need help with homework. I still want them to go to the doctor and dentist, just like my parents did after I moved out. 

I know their parents take care of them adequately. But I know I put them first whenever I could for five and a half years. And I believe that it takes a village to raise a child. I also believe that continuity is healthy. 

When a step parent divorces they are considered free of this responsibility. And if the step parent wants to help their kids because that's what they have devoted the last five years of their life to, their previous commitments are considered irrelevant unless they can prove the biological parents are bad parents. It doesn't matter how much the step parent benefited the step child. It only matters how the biological parents feel about the child's relationship with the parent.

I think that the best interests of the child and who has been caring for the child and that visitation requests by step parents should not be an opositional approach. Instead, safety and continuity should be the first consideration.

Where does the child live?

Can their housing and schooling locations be continued?

Who is responsible for the child's education?

How will that best be achieved? Who does the most care?

ETC.

 

 

When you take care of kids they take up your time

Working and planning to make sure things work out alright

Because they're depending on what you decide to get it right.

 

From early in the morning to late at night.

So many details you got to get right

Hoping that you get them to the bus on time.

And waving at them till the bus pulls out of sight.

 

When you can't see the kids, You don't feel right.  

You toss and you turn and you wonder if they're alright.  

You hope they're always treated right by everyone.  

When you can't see the ones that you took care of  

Day and night gave all your love  

What do you do with your dedication  

In that situation.  

 

When you feel like a part of you has died

Because the biggest part of your life has been denied

+8

 

She's A Good Wife 

She's a Good Wife

She's a good wife,
Cuz she don't let me down.

I married her,
Because she's the best I've found

I trust her and I know that
And she won't let me down.

When this cold world knocks me down, 

She lifts my spirits up off the ground, 

With kind words that can stop a frown.      

She holds me in her arms so tight, 

I'll keep her safe and warm all night           

And give her every delight she gives me and more 

I'll give her a love worth living for, 

That's for sure.

She's a good wife, 

She keeps me safe and sound.

So she's the one I want to have around.

 

I ain't saying that I'm always right,

And when she points it out she's not looking for a fight

She'll work it out

Day or night.

 

We might get mad, but I won't make her sad

I'll rarely be bad, I hope that she's glad

That she took me into her life

I'll be glad to reduce her pain and strife

That's right.

© Greg Spence Wolf 1 / 22/ 2021

 Updated 4/8/2021
                  
             

 

Socially shared poetry 

Kristin Ellisonoslin

 Well ordered coup executed in US.

      Defeated by capital police who saved the lives they sought,

            Pence, who should 25 Amend. Trump.

 

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They do not create jobs, they own them,  

I want to own my own job,  

Like the workers in Mondragon  

They do not create jobs, they buy them,  

No more mergers or aquisitions  

Don't let the corporations buy up the competition,  

They do not create jobs, they control them.  

The boss controls your work  And owns the means of production. 

© Greg Spence Wolf 4/11/2021

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I'm not a drunk

I just like to celebrate

Just because I can't wait to inebriate

Doesn't mean I'm out of control.

 

I'm not an alcoholic

I just like to have fun and frolic' 
Don't you dare talk about it

 

Don't try to control my drinking habits

When the booze is taking it's toll.

When you point out my decisions
I don't want to talk about it

So I'll make the price so high that you won't want to talk about it again.


It's all your fault that I'm here till last call +13

 

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Mi sexy esposa

Es muy hermosa

Yo quiero su cuerpo y su corazon.

© Greg Spence Wolf

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I Ride My Bicycle 

I RIDE MY BICYCLE

Round and round the town we go on our bicycles,

Round and round our pedals go, moving fast, moving slow,

Up and down the hills we go, huffing, puffing as we go,

Riding to the greatest places you could want to go.

 

I ride my bicycle to work every day,

And I take my bicycle, home every night,

Dealing with cars, who get in my way, and,

Dealing with potholes left and right.

 

And, when I ride, my bicycle at night.

I use a handle bar head light.

So I can see where I'm going.

 

I ride my bicycle to the grocery store,

And I take my bicycle, when I run my chores,

Dealing with drivers who yell, get out of the way,

Because they think I ride my bike real slow.

 

I try to ride, my bicycle really safe because,

I don't think that roads are safe for race.

I watch out for cars, cuz cars are dangerous,

I watch out for trucks, cuz trucks endanger us,

I keep my eyes upon the road.

 

Round and Round the country we go, on our bicycles,

Round and round our wheels go, clicking, ticking as they go,

Up and down the hills we go, building muscles as we go,

Riding to the greatest places you could want to go.

 

Lyrics By Greg Spence Wolf and Paul Glover Music By Greg Spence Wolf

https://music.apple.com/us/album/emotions/312882329

 

 

CABALIZO EN BICICLETA

Vuelta y vuelta a la ciudad vamos en nuestras bicicletas,

Alrededor y alrededor de nuestros pedales van,

moviéndose rápido, moviéndose lento, Arriba y abajo de las colinas vamos,

huffing, soplando a medida que avanzamos,

Cabalgando a los mejores lugares a los que podrías querer ir.

 

Voy en bicicleta al trabajo todos los días,

Y tomo mi bicicleta, a casa todas las noches,

Tratando con los coches, que se me mete en mi camino, y,

Tratando con baches a izquierda y derecha.

Y, cuando ando, mi bicicleta por la noche.

Yo uso una luz de la cabeza del manillar.

 

Así puedo ver adónde voy.

Voy en bicicleta a la tienda de comestibles,

Y tomo mi bicicleta, cuando dirijo mis tareas, T

ratando con conductores que gritan, inging de la manera,

Porque creen que ando en bicicleta muy despacio.

Trato de montar, mi bicicleta muy segura porque,

No creo que los caminos sean seguros para la carrera.

Cuído los coches, porque los coches son peligrosos,

Cuído a los camiones, porque los camiones nos ponen en peligro,

Mantenlo mis ojos en el camino.

Vuelta y vuelta al país vamos, en nuestras bicicletas,

Alrededor y alrededor de nuestras ruedas van, haciendo clic, marcando sobre la marcha,

Arriba y abajo de las colinas vamos, construyendo músculos a medida que avanzamos,

Cabalgando a los mejores lugares a los que podrías querer ir.

 

Translated by Microsoft Word

 

How We Are Divided Politically 

     We are divided politically by people using the media to stir up fear and hate for the purposes benfitting themselves by putting themselves on top of the feud.

Most of the memes posted online by people are fed to them by Facebook in order to start arguments. They use emotionally charged talking points that don't encourage critical thinking but instead work to encourage blame.

One meme showed a veteran with an amputated foot.  It said, "I bet none of you kneelers are gonna get this vet a new leg."

  • It wasn't a link to a fundraiser. 
  • It wasn't an information picture about what injured vets need. 
  • It wasn't a critique of Colin Kapaernick. 

It was posted by my neighbor who is constantly drunk and looking for an argument. 

Memes that tap into your hurt feelings are looking for an argument, but not a constructive debatre. 

Memes that say, "I bet you won't share this." are looking for an argument, not to further a cause, not to raise money for a charity. 

It completely ignores the fact that Kapaernick's kneeling was about Treyvon Martin and other Black people murdered by bigots. Colin Kaepernick's kneeling is not an antiwar protest. 

Misinformation is being removed from Facebook, which might help. 

The other media source that intentionally divides people is Republican Party radio and Fox news.

They use:

Misinformation (Limbaugh denying COVID-19 and saying it was like the flu)

Scapegoating

-When FOX News ranteed on and on during the weeks mleading up to the midterms, about immigrants who are refugees from extreme poverty and painting them as thugs. 

Encouraging Violence

-When Tucker Carlson makes an excuse for political violence done against people he disagrees with. Like his rationalization for Kyle Rittenhouse's shooting of non-violent Black Lives Matter protesters. 

It is hard ti debate politics when the people you are talking to think murder is okay against political protesters. 

MSNBC uses the script in less extreme ways against Republicans. 

I like when MSNBC interviews progressives like Warren and Sanders. 

But I hate their opinion pieces about Republicans that repeat an opinion for five minutes. 

And when they slam Trump for being weak on military. They are partisanly encouraging war. Not because we need to be at war, but because they want the other party to look bad to voters. 

When MSNBC does this, they sound like Republican partisans to me. I wish I could play the videos on both FOX and MSNBC for the opposing sides so they can see how they are being manipulated at specific times for specific reasons. 

We are so divided in our information that most Republicans don't know that during the Capitol Hill riot Trump was watching it on TV, and didn't call in the National Guard. Republicans who are elected to office feel they need their president to win so badly so that the party ticket can win and carry them to victory. This forces them to put party over country and the world and be more likely to allow a bad decision by their president to go uncritiqued. 

How do you have a debate when one side doesn't hold their leaders accountable for anything because they either don't want to do the intellectual work of understanding others. Or because people who own media have a vested interest in manipulating their emotions for partisan and or personal political gain.

 

Watch The Buffalo Walking Down The Road 

One day in Yellowstone 

The buffalo filled up the road 

Someone took a film and shared it on the web 

So we could watch the Buffalo roam down the road. 

Please watch the Buffalo walking slow down the road 

Mellow buffalo moving slowly down the road 

Wait and yield because this is their home where we built the road 

The land where the buffalo roam 

© Greg Spence Wolf 

Courtesy of Sioux @native_sioux on Twitter. https://twitter.com/i/status/1317495082241589248