Thoughts on Parenting

When you watch kids they take up your time.

Working and planning and making sure things turn out fine

Because they're depending on you to and what you decide

To come out right.


I raise kids for five and a half years,

Held their hands, dried their tears,

Listenned to their hopes and fears.


From early in the morning till you tuck them in at night

There's so many details you got to get right

Including getting them to the bus on time.

And waving at them while they drive out of sight.

Bye Bye, for now.


You take them back and forth to school

And teach them all the golden rules

Give the best advice you have

On making friends and doing math.


Hoping that they'll eat the food upon their plates.

Hoping that you can find food that they don't hate.

Tell them where to find their first jobs




One of the first days I was watching my stepson, back in fall 2013 I was doing dishes in the kitchen when a friend called to ask for advice. My four year old step-kid was making a blanket, stuffed animal fort over the living room furniture. That was one of his favorite activities.

My friend asked me what the commotion was in the background and I explained that they were playing and having a blast.

She said, "Ah, childcare." To which I replied.


My step-kid loved making forts out of blankets and pillows. He loved pillow fights. At times it seemed childish, but then again, why shouldn't children be a little childish.


I had a good relationship with my stepson. But our wake up routine was challenging.

I remember all the different strategies I used to persuade my son to get out of bed quicker .

One family member told me to drag em out. I decided that I wasn't going to push his feet out of bed as I was told, and instead that I would persuade him to get up. This is easier said than done.
Another family member used to remove his blankets, so I tried that. This often led to a defensive reaction and then to me rationalizing the action. Ultimately, it all seemed too abrupt and I eventually figured out a two new ways to get a stubborn kid up and excited about the day.

After years of realizing I had an opositional approach as well. I tried using low interest but interesting videos, like folk music. I found that this created a more relaxing mood and less resistance to getting up. When I was able to get myself up independently as a kid I would wake up to the radio. With my step-kid, a music video that isn't a favorite, but is still good, put him in a good mood and bred a more cooperative attitude. 

The other strategy was to offer a reward for getting up on time, usually a snack after school. I raised the bar by a minute each day, so that the child became more self disciplined and was more likely to look at getting up positively. 

At one time, this was working so well that we were twenty minutes early to school. My 2nd grade stepkid asked if they could get a snack before school. I said yes because they did a good job and traffic was light . They got fritos and I got gas and coffee.

There was a three dollar limit on the treat and it had to be free of artificial colors, flavors or preservatives.


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